
Senseless Epiphanies
That’s what they truly are, but I call it a silly thought.
First of all an Epiphany can be defined as: a sudden profound understanding of something.
Growing up in the north, I quickly realized that you have to make your own fun, if you want it.
So now, I do my best to put a twist on life.
Listed here are a collection of the things that are not widely realized, but they happen all the same.
- Everything is heavy, if you hold it long enough
- Give a dog a choice between a million dollars and a chicken wing; the dog will always choose a chicken wing
- A hamburger has no front or back. That is, until you bite it
- Concrete and Glass; their both mostly made from sand. This means that some skyscrapers are technically just really large sandcastles.
- Banjos are guitars with southern accents
- I’m pretty sure the goal of technology is to make humans useless
- A pizza is just a pie chart that shows you how much pizza you have left
- Every zoo is a petting zoo, if you’re brave enough
- Anything can be a boomerang, but only if you through it straight up.
- Will power! There’s only one thing that can match it: Won’t power.
- You can drink a drink, but you can’t food a food.
- Kool-aid is just water-seasoning
- Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Philosophy is wondering if ketchup is a smoothie.
- The fact that our body breathes for us automatically just means the brain doesn’t trust us to do this on our own.
- Regardless of price, Velcro will always be a rip-off
- You can’t shake what your mamma gave you if you look like your dad.
- People say they take the bus, but in reality? The bus takes you
- Labeling something military grade makes it seem really high quality; that is until it comes to food.
There, hopefully you’ve enjoyed these, maybe got a little laugh.
To hear more, just listen into the Mid-Day Show 10 a.m to 1 p.m , and I’ll be sure to try make you at least shake your head at the things I say.
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